until next time

Tomorrow is the big day. Tomorrow I leave for Timberline Knolls. I won’t have access to my phone or the internet, so I’ll be MIA for a little while. I Continue reading →

treatment funsies. not.

Tomorrow is day 19 of treatment. In the grand scheme of things, that’s just a drop in the bucket compared to the cumulative months I have spent at CSA. As Continue reading →

when words fail

I’m feeling so discouraged, so hopeless, so broken. I’m angry at my treatment team, which in my mind is not ok because they are some of my biggest supporters, and Continue reading →

a cry for help

I am completely, utterly terrified. It’s only the weekend, and I’m not slated to be admitted to Cedar Springs until Thursday. That’s right, I’m going back to treatment. It was Continue reading →

broken.

Today has been one big crazy party in my head. The obsessing about food. The panicking about every little detail of life. The wanting to be empty. What a fucking Continue reading →

i wish for brighter days

I am so fucking livid right now. I’m just over other people trying to control me. My family therapist once told me that if I don’t learn to be assertive, Continue reading →

so come with me where dreams are born & time is never planned

“When the first baby laughed for the first time, its laugh broke into a thousand pieces, and they all went skipping about, and that was the beginning of fairies.” I Continue reading →

slipping. sliding. reaching. hiding.

I feel a little bit like I’m drowning. The past week and a half has been full of drinking, purging, cutting, and not really following my meal plan. What’s scary Continue reading →